Wow this seems fast! I spoke with a coordinator from Omaha, and they’d like us to come out next week to meet the team, have some evaluations, and make a plan. Then if we decide to give birth there, they’d want me out there at around 36 weeks.... best case scenario until she’s ready to go home! I asked for more time to talk with hospitals here, or at least see what Stanford has to say, because we have a support system of family and friends in the Bay Area too... but don’t know anyone in Nebraska! I cried to the coordinator on the phone as the thought of uprooting Kevin and I from our regular day-to-day lives to the middle of the USA for an undefined amount of time started to settle in as a real option of gigantic life changing proportion.. Poor lady on the phone. She was amazing and my tears didn’t even fluster her, must be why she’s the one with that job! We’ll think about our game plan, pray, check flights, and get back to her this week.
I have a call in to Stanford’s Fetal and Pregnancy Health Program. Waiting for the nurse coordinator to call me back. I did find on the SOFT website (Support Organization For Trisomies... trisomy.org) that someone reported having a cardiac surgery done at Stanford in 2014. The list is just based on people taking the time to report what surgeries they had, so it’s not comprehensive, but shows that at least one baby with Trisomy 13 or 18 has had heart surgery at Stanford! Happy for that!
Decisions are not my strongest strength in life... far from it actually. For example, while I’m feverishly scribbling down notes as the coordinator from Omaha is talking to me... I’m wishing that I had been able to make a decision about which planner I wanted to buy, because this new info should be going in the planner! I can always transfer the info later though, and I’m confident that because we’re asking God for wisdom, that He will give it to us. The wisdom I’m gaining so far, that has been growing in me through my adult life is that my thought process might not always be spot on. Like if we choose to go to Omaha, it doesn’t mean that Stanford was a sub-par choice and this decision doesn’t necessarily just have one right answer. Sometimes, or often, actually, I treat big life decisions as if they are all or nothing. But so much in life is about getting through the downs/cons and then taking time to enjoy the ups/pros that inevitably come with all decisions. And it’s not like God is only in one of these hospitals. He’ll be there regardless of where “there” is on the map, because we’ll be there and I know He’s with us.
So come on decisions, we can always change our minds later if you’re not working out for us, and with great change comes the great opportunity for anxiety... but also adventure! This is one of those moments when I just get out of my head and trust the Lord with it, because if I want His plans for Annelise, I’ve got to be willing to go with what He might design, instead of sticking to my own plan that I’ve convinced myself is the most comfortable.
Love our people so much! It fills my heart to know people are praying for us, even people we haven't met! I wanted to share some songs that have helped to hold my heart when it’s so heavy, and we’re shared with me by some of YOU! Thank you!
This one hits home just as much about foster care for me as it does for my Annelise.
I love how someone else wrote a worship song that speaks just what my heart needs to say and hear.
Good ol' Steven Curtis Chapman! He's been bringing it since I had his cassette tapes! :)
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